Last updated: 06:00 PM ET, Fri June 12 2015

Bow Before the Captivating, Enchanting Website Dedicated to Airport Carpet

Entertainment | Gabe Zaldivar | June 12, 2015

Bow Before the Captivating, Enchanting Website Dedicated to Airport Carpet

Image via Carpets for Airports

Exhilarated by the thrill of an escalator ride? Find counting ceiling tiles to be a mesmerizing and worthwhile use of your time? Boy howdy, you are going to love this.

CNN’s Barry Neild interviewed George Pendle, the “self-described CEO and summer intern” of website Carpets for Airports, which is an undertaking that archives just that.

Pendle, through his website, lists a flood of airports and the carpets that line their respective floors.

It sounds roughly like the kind of excitement that comes from actually shopping for carpet.

But in a twist we never saw coming, the journey around the world is really like a magic carpet ride thanks to Pendle’s great sense of humor.

However, before we meet the person responsible for such carpet indulgence we might as well take a closer look at the website.

Now besides a soundtrack that invokes what it might sound like to sleep on Star Trek’s USS Enterprise, the website boasts over 100 carpets from around the world.

DCA has to be one of our favorite breakdowns.

While we can certainly see how this piece of carpet “defies a semantic perspective,” we would rather just get the hell out of the airport and onto our journey, so you will excuse us if we don’t stop and take pictures.

But again, this massive undertaking is not without a tremendous sense of humor. It’s the kind of ridiculous corner of the Internet that will have you pondering whether it was all created thanks to Xanax and alcohol.

The answer to which is a resounding yes.

Pendle explains to Neild as to the impetus behind the website: “A nervous flier, I was due to travel from Newark to London Heathrow and had ingested the usual mixture of alcohol and Xanax to help get me through the flight. Unfortunately my flight was delayed, so I was forced to sit in the waiting area, semi-comatose, for hour after hour, unable to do anything but stare at the carpet. It was then that I was awakened to the majesty and grandeur of airport carpeting.”

We once stared at one of those magic paintings that become something else entirely if you look at them long enough, so we know what he is talking about.

Now before you scoff at the endeavor, consider that an entire city has been flipping out over carpeting for quite some time now.

The subject of PDX’s departure from its classic carpet is brought up, and Pendle certainly has thoughts on the subject. Spoiler alert: He is not a fan.

But the real joy, besides poring over one piece of fabric after another, is reading over some truly awesome quotes.

When asked his thoughts on non-carpeted airports. The quick-witted Pendle replies, “Who can explain the evil that men do?”

And his denouement comes with a flourish. Neild asks about other work he has going on at the moment and Pendle responds, “I am a writer currently working on a history of the even-numbered kings of England.”

If it were done with the same gusto, we would be inclined to read such tedium.


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