Here's a word that seems utterly lost in manly culture these days.
Gentlemanly.
It's something I try to stress to my two sons, ages 14 and 10, even though it's almost an anachronism in the 21st century. I still believe in pulling the chair out for my wife at dinner, holding the door open for her - or any woman - going into or out of an establishment, asking before assuming, and more.
So when I saw an online magazine article entitled "How To Fly Like A Gentleman," it certainly caught my eye. And I found myself agreeing with almost every point, some of which I'd like to address here.
DRESS
Few things irritate me more than watching a guy come on board in jeans and a T-shirt or, worse, sweat pants. And don't even get me started on flip-flops. Sorry bro, I just don't want to see your scurvy, gnarly feet. Like the article said, nobody is asking you to dress in a three-piece suit with a pocket watch. But a pair of slacks and a polo shirt would be nice. Heck, even a nice pair of dress jeans with a button down shirt or turtleneck.
Oh, and lose the 12 pieces of jewelry. Esquire magazine once wrote, and I firmly believe this, that the well-dressed man wears just two pieces of jewelry - his wedding ring and his wristwatch. To this day it's all I wear. You're looking for something that reflects well on you.
Too many people have the attitude of "I don't care, I'll never see these people again." You'd be surprised who you see again and, even if you don't, you know the old saying - you don't get a second chance to make a first impression.
PUBLIC CIVILITY
There's something to be said for simply being nice.
Stop shaking your head in the security line, making sarcastic comments to no one that are loud enough for everyone to hear, hassling the TSA agents … it is what it is. Your whining and moaning isn't going to make the line move any faster, and if you're cutting it close to your flight time, well, it's your problem. Leave earlier.
PRIVATE CIVILITY
You have an issue with the flight.
You have an issue with your seat.
You just realized you sat down next to Chatty Cathy.
Again, all these should be handled with decorum and civility. Speak to the gate agent in a pleasant tone and with a smile, but not in a tone that makes it sound like you're in a Meatpacking District nightclub trying to pick her up. Drop the "Oh, c'mon, I know you want to upgrade me" bit and ask nicely.
Same thing with your seatmate. The article makes a great point - airlines pack in passengers so closely these days that it almost seems uncivil not to speak to each other. But if that's not what you want, there are subtle ways not to engage in conversation - or to push if you were the one who tried to initiate chit-chat.
OVERALL
Think about it for a moment. You've just taken a long flight to get to your destination. Do you want to get off that plane with a head full of steam, or do you want to exit cool, calm and collected and ready to start your journey?
That's what I thought, gentlemen.
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