Airbus' New Helmet Helps Corner The Market on Insane Patents

Image via US Patent Office

If Airbus has its way, the passengers of tomorrow will be shipped across the globe like giant slabs of meat-albeit well entertained slabs of meat.

CNN and Business Insider report on the latest patent proposal from aviation manufacturer Airbus, which contains a proposed helmet that would solve airline passengers' sensory needs.

Fashioned by French inventor Bernard Guering, the patent calls for helmets passengers would wear throughout the flight, including during pre and post-flight monotony.

Essentially, you would be cut off from the rest of the cabin, fully immersed in your own virtual world, which would include a wide swath of sensations.

The patent explains the impetus behind the device, via CNN: "During aircraft flights, certain passengers have periods when they are bored either during a wait phase preceding take off or following landing or during a cruise phase. More-over it is known that aircraft flights generate stress for certain passengers."

To alleviate that stress, Airbus may one day offer a way to get you to your own happy place…by cramming your noggin into a helmet.

CNN's Barry Neild explains quite graphically, "The patent suggests that placing passengers in partial or total 'sensorial isolation' by piping audio and video directly into their eyes and ears - and squirting 'odorous substances' up their nose -- will help make all this go away."

Ah yes, the solution to airline travel isn't more room, but treating people like jelly-filled donuts, stuffing as much goodness in as will fit.

Here is an image that should give readers a semblance of what the technology will look like:

Image via US Patent Office

Now to be fair, the technology sounds pretty amazing, giving passengers an oasis of the mind. If it works, you could be whisked away by whatever sights, sounds and smells are pumped into that helmet. Please, however, disregard that eventually thousands upon thousands of people will have stuck their head in there as well.

Now we have to think they at least borrowed the idea from the movie Wall-E.

The future is here people, and we are just chubby travelers along for the ride.

Unfortunately, there is no word as to when or if this technology will be used. Though we love this idea over a previous Airbus patent. As you might recall, the aviation manufacturer filed a patent for saddle seating earlier this year, which would seemingly eliminate what remaining comfort we travelers have in our tiny, cramped accommodations already.

If Airbus had its way, it would just knock us out, pump great dreams into our heads as we fly around the world packed on top of one another.

As long as those "odorous substances" they plan to force feed our nostrils is pleasant, we guess we won't put up too much of a fuss.

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